Travelin' onwards!

Well I'm back in good ole Vinton, Iowa! Colorado will always have a special spot in my heart and memories filled with warmth and all the firsts of my new adventure.

The last week of the round was a busy time moving the distribution center to a whole new facility in a matter of days. I worked along with people who will always be in my mind and heart. 

Now being back in campus with the rest of my class, it seems like we've never left. I'm so happy to see all of my friends again and having a shower in the same building. I find it kind of funny that my team and I still hang out most of the day here at campus. Being back on campus for transition week is a lot more different then CTI(corps training institute). We have a lot more free time during the day and more freedom to a certain level.

We officially found out where we're going next for three months...drumroll... DC!!!! Yes!!!! I am super excited that we'll be in the capitol! I've visited a few times before and there are so many great opportunities to help people! I can not wait to do ISPs (individual Service Projects). But what will I be doing in DC for work?! Well, do you remember a few posts back when I mentioned the works of FEMAConnect ?   My team will be working at FEMA headquarters to develop and test out the new program of FEMAConnect. I yet to now when exactly we will be leaving for the east coast, but hopefully soon!

I am so sorry for not posting in a while! I've been very busy and I will tell you all about it in my next posting!! Love you and miss you all!! Til the next one, have a wonderful life!

I found a good Christmas vest!

 I made front page in Colorado!!

 Our fearless leaders!

 We made sure to stop by right before we left.

 Jess and I were prepared for the ride!!

 

Wlecome to the Flipside of life!!!

So the fact that it is almost Thanks Giving kind of freaks me out. This will be my first of many holidays and birthdays away from my family and friends. That honestly scares me. It reminds me that I will miss important times with the people that I love. My usual traditional Thanks Giving is just an relaxing day with my family, eating food, playing games, taking naps, and teasing each other. I'll miss teasing my youngest brother about losing at a game that we are playing, and seeing his face get all red when he argues back. I'll miss my oldest brother making fun of me about something stupid and when I throw a comeback, seeing his crooked proud grin. I'll miss my second oldest brother playing guitar at every second and trying to teach me a new song on my guitar. I'll miss talking to my favorite Uncle about all things in life and some more. I'll miss cooking in the kitchen with my Aunt and giggling as we sing all sorts of her favorite childhood songs. I'll miss waking up in the morning and watching the Macy Day Parade with my Mom. I'll miss peeling potatoes with my Dad as he tells me once again all of his childhood stories. I'll miss the stillness of the house that night, once everyone has settled and the aroma of our day still lingers. It's all of these simple actions that make the day so important to me. It's the fact that we all come together for one day, and we are all just simply there.
And I know it's just another thing to miss, a fact of living my kind of life now. But it's something that I think I need to remember on why it was, is, important to me. This is something to keep me grounded. To keep me grounded in the sense of belonging somewhere. As long as I keep in touch with these memories and my dearest friends and family, I'll know that I belong somewhere special and forever, no matter where I will be in the world. Its the memories of my Saturday night crew, Martha Ice Cream runs senior year, Sunday school classes, Play practices, the adventures of Planet Fitness and Target, those early Sunday diner runs with my Dad, jamming sessions with my brothers, the special dates with my favorite little kids, the special dates with my favorite big kids, and all the late night conversations with multiple friends. Its these memories that comes to mind when I become homesick. And you would think remembering them would make me sad and just wanting to go home. But the truth is, that these memories make me stronger. It's what makes me happy at the end of a long rough day. It makes me realize how many people I have that are behind me and will stand behind me to catch me if I ever fall.

Working at the distribution center can either make you jaded or can be a humbling experience. The fact that we have to always be in a mindset of caution, can make the times rough. We need to make sure that the client is not abusing the center, which means I have to tell people that they can't take this or that, oh and whatever that thing is, because we believe that you are taking advantage of the whole center. How can you nicely put that to someone, who may even have four children with them? I've felt embarrassed, humiliated, angry, and just plain shame in doing my job at times. Its these moments that you can become jaded. You look at every client and wonder if they are really in need or are they just taking advantage. I hate it. I hate when these thoughts come into my mind. It feels like these thoughts are just coming in like a black plague. They ruin your whole look out on that day and a few.

But then I talk to a client that comes in regularly, always just taking barley enough for a week. I ask how their day is, and they wonder how my day is. They ask me where I'm from, and what I want to do in life. They ask what's my family like, and how can I possibly be away from them at my age during the holidays. They tell me all about how happy they are that the center even exists. They tell me how grateful they are that they have found this knick-knack or that knick-knack because it reminds them of something from their past. They tell me how hard it has been since the disaster, and how this person or that group has helped them in some way. They rejoice with me when they have good news. And most of all they say Thank you, and they truly mean it. When was the last time that you said thank you to someone who simply just packed your bags for you? I can't think of a single time I have done that. I have met so many great people that won't ever realize how much they have inspire me to do my job.

No matter what you do, there will always be a flipside. The flipside can either be better or worse than the other. The coin can be flipped in matter of seconds, hours, days, years, or a lifetime. If you look at a coin, it never seems to be smooth, stable when its on the move, or simple. If you look at your life, when has it been smooth, stable when your on the move, or simple? So my flipside to my Thanks Giving is that I'll be spending it in the Mountains of Colorado, cooking and relaxing with my freshly new family. I'll be thinking of my mom as my teammates and I watch the Macy Day Parade. I'll be thinking of my brother as I play my guitar, couldn't help myself when I bought the damn thing in Longmont,CO. I'll be thinking of my brother when I bicker with my team. I'll be thinking of my Uncle as I talk about life with my teammates. I'll be thinking of my Dad and Aunt as I cook the potatoes and a few other side dishes and sing. I'll be thinking of how lucky I was to have those memories, and how lucky I am to be able to make new memories with the people I call my teammates.

Happy Thanks Giving!! I truly hope that you have a wonderful day full of blessings and giving's. I truly hope that you reminisce your past Thanks Giving's and  remind yourself that you are grounded because of the people that have loved you and the people who love you today. So at last must bid you a goodbye until the next post. I miss and love you all.

P.S. If you want please comment, write a letter, or even call to just say hi!!!!

My oldest brother and I before I left.

My two best friends the night before I left.

My new family.

That's a boulder... in Boulder County....in Boulder, CO...

19 more days. There's 19 more days left of my very first round. I'm in awe that the time has flown by that quickly. I remember freaking out over what to pack in August, and now I'm debating on what I should send back home. I remember being afraid that my team would hate me back in July, now I can't go a day without talking to everyone at least once. It's funny how before this program started, I was so worried about all of these small things, that are now pointless.

19 more days I have left in Colorado, with 13 more work days. 13 more days of working face to face with the survivors and making sure that they're voices are heard. There are many people that I have meet, heard their stories and wanted to cry for them right then and there. The amount of strength that these people have, amazes me and inspires me to work through the long hard days.

19 more days left sleeping on a couch, with three other girls in the room. I was lucky to even get the couch near a window. My room has been the hangout room, mostly because we have the couches and the TV with a VCR. We watch movies almost every night, which means I fall asleep quickly.

19 more days left in the small town Berthoud. This town is kind of like a freaky story book town. It's small with a few chain stores and everything closes at 9 pm. I'm not a big fan of the curfew that the town apparently has, but the people are nice and friendly.

19 more days left of having to go somewhere for laundry. Which really means I'll probably will only do laundry three more times. I'm just that lazy about it. But really, who has the time to do laundry when you get home at 730 pm, have to eat, workout/shower, do paperwork, have meetings, and relax. For me laundry is on the back burner. That is until I run out of socks and underwear. But I can last two weeks!!

19 days until we are back in Vinton, Iowa, home sweet home. It'll be nice to see everyone and to be somewhere that is less tense.

I am extremely lucky to have had the opportunity to help a family the past three days. My team and I have been mucking and gutting a house that did not do well in the flood. We would go in before work, digging out the river mud from their property. The amount of satisfaction  we all had once the days were done was unbelievable. I had fun switching from inside clean work, to outside dirty work for a few hours.

The most important lesson I have learned is to be positive. During the long work days and weeks I become tired of having to deal with certain people who makes issues within our jobs. What I personally do to deal with the stress build up is to let it fall. Let them fall off your shoulders, backs, necks, and minds. Now this is easier said then done. I smile and joke around, keeping my mind off of the subject of the negatives. When I work out, I work my butt off, letting the steam release from my body and mind. When I play guitar, I practice to the point of mind numbing fingering. I keep in contact with my friends and family back home, writing letters, texting, Facebook, calling, and face time. To me, the best release is to talk to someone back home and feel the familiarity of my home through our conversations. I come to terms with my stresses and that's what makes the difference between holding everything in and letting it out. The positive outlook in life makes all the difference in most situations.

Well here is the post, sorry for the delay! We've been very busy! I hope you have enjoyed all of my posts so far! Atlas, I must say goodbye until the next one! I miss you all and hope you have had a wonderful life since I've seen you last! Please write! my address can be found in one of my pervious posts!!! Love you all!!!

 An old man named Outlaw gave me the rose.

Working!!

Went on a beautiful hike, learning about the impact of the flood in the parks.

 The whole team!

 That's a BIG boulder!!!

To lean or to not lean is the real question!!

I have moved a little south of Denver, CO on Sunday. We are now in an actual hotel room with a kitchen, a real bed, a real shower, and of course a door to close. It's a fantastic feeling when you can cook again after having the same kind of heavy greasy food for the past 5-6 weeks.
The reason why we moved was because we had a new assignment. We are now currently working in the JFO(Joint Field Office) which is the main building for this disaster. We are working on a brand new program called FEMA Connect. This is a program to help a new generation of preparers against disasters. This program for right now is mainly for high schoolers. Our job this week was to build it up to a level it has yet reached. And after two days of training and two days of research and one presentation, I am proud to say we tripled the programs range. We hope that we impressed our higher ups during our presentation and in the future we will be assigned the project for one of our rounds.

Starting next week my team will move once again, to north of Denver, to run a donation distribution center. Our new housing will be a basement church with a full kitchen, which I can't wait for, some mats to sleep on, a foosball and pool table, a few rooms to ourselves, and some showers at the local middle school. It'll defiantly be an interesting time for a month and a half, but I'm happy that we will all be working together, I'm happy that I get to experience all of this with my team.

Being one of the youngest on the team at times can be... well annoying. There's times where it seems like they just look at me and automatically think I'm not qualified to do real work. They automatically think I'm going to be immature. The best thing is when I prove them wrong. When I turn out to be more mature than them. Though at times it seems like I can't ever just let loose, be goofy, be immature, and just relax. It seems like they put me up so much that I can do no wrong... but in reality I make mistakes left and right, I cry...sometimes, I can take jokes a bit too far, I have experiences in pain, physical, mental, and emotional, I do things that later on I'm not proud of. But of course I don't want the older people to know because they will look down at me, think of me as a lesser person, an average teenager who doesn't have a care in the world, one who just put themselves first. It's an balancing act. But of course I'm not suppose to care what people think of me... which is full bologna. Because I do, I want people to see me as mature, caring, whole hearted, funny, smart, nice, someone who will make a difference, easy going, someone who will always be there for anyone no matter what. I know there will always be negatives for myself. I know there will be people who won't like me. This is life. In life we have hardships that seem to never end. In life we have mistakes that feel like they haunt us. In life we have scars that will forever stay with us. In life we have times where we can't help but breakdown in front of everyone. In life we have joy. Those bliss moments that last for what feels like seconds. The uncontrollable giggles that last for a few blinks. The smiles of certain that brand our minds and hearts. Those tears that only come when few people visit home. Those sights that take your breath away. The love that comes from so many different things in life is what makes life a wonder. It's a wonder, no life is the same, and that's the beauty of it all. We may go through similar paths, but the light at the end of each path is always a different color. Our paths overlap, split up, disappear, crack, turn sharply, and at times feel never ending. So my advice is to lean into it. Lean into your life paths with a shit eating grin. Don't hesitate to the point that you just pause for a lifetime. Take that leap and lean into it. This is life that we all must live, because if you don't... what do you have to look forward to when you don't have any stories to look back on and be able to just shake your head, grin that shit eating grin, and tell people "Holy shit I did that!". I want to lean into a life full of moments of different joys, hardships, and bliss.

My dear friends and family, what do you want to lean into? Please write to me about these moments n your life. You can comment, call me, or hell please send me a letter! Or better yet you can just think about it. Leaning is just a simple meaning of life. At this moment I am leaning into my service project, last year I was leaning into making memories with friends in school, the year before that I was just leaning into becoming someone who can beat the hardships of life in one piece. These moments are what makes a person. The journey has just begun for me.... remember it's never too late.

Thank you all, and I hope you have enjoyed my post. Please do respond I love seeing them. Until the next posting, have a wonderful life!!!!! I love you all and miss you!!!!!

Done for the day!

I love my job

oh hey!

Long day of work

these were awful but I like the name!

Packing once again getting easier each time!

Halloween!!!

Oh god!

beauty

I was cranberry sauce

Pine 5 Halloween we were thanksgiving dinner!!

 well we are on a budget after all...

 George meet Homer

Aren't we adorable?! ...tired late night laundry

Another Day in Paradise... and a few more

Everyday is just another day. I wake up, eat breakfast, and then I do something that has become normal. My uniform. I proudly wear my A and my FEMA clothes. And every time I hear someone tell me about their troubles and their gratitude, I sit up straighter and my A and FEMA weighs a little bit more. One by one, these survivors have made every hardship worth it in this program. Everyday I look around at what we have done in a matter of weeks and my heart swells. My favorite thing in the world is people. They all are so grateful for what they have and all they want to do is help each other, it's inspiring.

I have moved around like crazy within the crews of FEMA. Yet, I'm meeting the nicest people to work with. But if I want to be totally truthful, the people I truly want to work with is my own team. I have nine other people who are amazing, and who have already become my family. We joke, we laugh, we talk, we argue, we roll our eyes, we hug, we do everything like a real dysfunctional family. And the crazy thing is that it has only been 9 weeks of knowing each other...

Every Sunday we have been having our one day off. It's a weird thing saying "Guys, we have a two days off!!". Last weekend was so simple, so relaxing. A group of us went into Boulder, planning to go on a hike. We were slow getting up, and we decided to mosey our way to Boulder. By the time we ate breakfast(at 1130), went by a Flee Market(spent an hour there), and rode the bus into Boulder it was already 2 o'clock in the afternoon. So instead of hiking, we improvised and explored the city. It was priceless. There are so many treasured places there that I found. It was quite dangerous for someone who doesn't want to spend any money.

By the end of this month I bet I'm going to have about five more business cards from the people I meet here. I had talked to three "townies" the other night and they believed I should become a politician...I'm not quite sure about that, but they were very nice people and they all gave me their personal information, just incase I come back to the area. The Baptist people have all told me that they want to set me up with their sons... I swear all I do is be myself and joke around, and somehow people love it. For instance this morning one of the old men serving breakfast asked where I got such a grin. I was speechless...mostly because it was 6 in the morning but nonetheless I was speechless. Everyone is so friendly it makes everything so much fun. I have played the guitar a few times for the Baptist and they just love it!

So I have now been looking into my Life After AmeriCorps, and it is now complicated. Before this program I had a plan. Go to college for Occupational therapy. And now? Well now I have no idea what to do with my life. Well actually no, that is a false statement. I know I want to continue this service. I've been thinking about doing another year of AmeriCorps. After that maybe doing a few Abroad study and services. And the eventually college. This whole future thing is giving me slight anxiety. But then I look at all the amazing possibilities that my life can take hold off, that I get excited to liv my life. I have learned from this program already that I will not settle for anything less then what I want. I have become a wanderlust, this life has caught me into it's grasp and I am not planning to loose grip until I am done. But of course I will take breaks and go back to my true home in Upstate New York and make sure that my friends and family know that I will always come back to them in the end. They are my true strength, love, and place.

Sorry for the late posting, I've been quite busy. Thank you all for reading and I will be writing again in a week or two. Love you all and miss you all!!! Please send me letters if you want! Have a wonderful til next time!!!!

It's Colorado... Wait what?!?!

Colorado is a beautiful state. The mountains greet me in the morning and comforts me in the evening. My work is one of my favorite things to do now. So really, it doesn't feel like a job. I get to be outside all day, meeting new people every step I take forward. The faces of certain survivors will be engraved in my memory as they go into their story of hardships, the pain, sorrow, confusion, and unbelief of their situation. Yet every survivor that has been fully impacted by the flood has this attitude of gratefulness. The pure emotion that flows through the words of the survivors trickles in my memory days after. This job is not a job, but a way to make a mark in this world.

My crew is a perfect mess. I have people here that I will always look up to and think of when we soon leave for the next disaster. After a month of training I learned all the technology and basics of DSA, after a week of working I have learned the inside and outs of how to truly work efficiently with a diverse group of individuals who are very hardheaded and compassionate about the work that they do. I have gotten so much recognition from the people here it makes me squirm and excited to do more. 

More than half of my team is working across town, and on some days it seems like half if my back is missing. We have all grown so close in the past weeks that its kind of scary to think about leaving all of them at the en of this crazy journey. But we need to not dwell on the future but bask in the present. Everyday after work we'll hug eachother and ask about their day, joke around, and enjoy eachothers company. 

It's funny how I am completely at ease here. I miss home, but I am not homesick , I miss my friends, but I love my new ones, I miss the familiarity of my past, but I bask in the crazy dream that I am living. 

I work 6 days a week and 12 hours a day. On Tuesday I had an amazing, relaxing, fun day off. My teammate Jess and I went into the city of Boulder. The beginning of the day was... Interesting. We had to go into the city by bus and we kept on getting confused by the bus schedule but we finally got on a bus!!!... And they didn't have any change... But after a very nice rider we got the whole thing situated and rode on in Boulder. The hike was simply amazing. We had all day to be free and relaxing as we made stop after stop on the way up, just to enjoy the breathtaking view at every step. Now I have been on countless hikes back home in NY, but this beauty here is entirely different. It was a perfect day to end a hard working week. 

I hope that you have enjoyed this posting and I want to apologize for the lateness and the horrible grammar. Thank you all so much for reading and please comment or send me letters any time!! I love the getting post!!!! Love you all!!! Til next posting have an amazing life!! 

Ready for work! 

 A cool library in a neighborhood  

We missed eachother after our first day of work. 

Sooo....Colorado?

Hello to all!! I apologize for my lateness of this post but it's been CRAZY!! A week ago we all were going to Anniston, Alabama!...wait quickly change that to somewhere in Colorado...maybe? That was basically all of the end of last week. I had no idea where I was going to be in three days... Which is really weird. But there is something about the unknown that excites me! The options are endless(that is within the country of course) and it makes my heart beat, my dream living, my spirit burn, my soul soar, and my life exciting!  We left everyone early morning Saturday for Denver, Colorado! It was interesting driving for about 13 hours that day plus stopping every two hours to switch drivers and getting lost twice? Maybe it was three times... But I was NOT driving!! (That's a first) We were basically all asleep the whole way there, when you are not driving and being safety of course( safety = passenger in the front)! We drove through the rest of Iowa, then Nebraska, Kansas, and Finally Colorado!! The site along each state was absolutely beautiful (except for all the corn...). Once we hit Denver however, the beauty was breathless. The mountains are in the background as if it's looking out for you. The blues and whites upon them fall into each other like paint softly brushed. They make me think of my hometown and makes me truly love nature! The Dusks and Dawns are by far my favorite time of day. Both times I am thinking of everything I have done and the beginnings and ends that I have experienced in the last 5 weeks. The colors relaxes me as everything slows down around me. 

Anyhow! We do have training this week, in a classroom, boring, dry, and full of old people who LOVES to contradict the instructors. But then again when do they NOT love to do that hahaha. We've been staying at hotel to hotel, that is until last night. We moved into a big building that reminds me of a airplane hanger or a warehouse. We are incredibly lucky thanks to the Missouri Relief team that is letting us stay with them and they are even cooking us food!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you tell that I am happy about food?  It's a cool experience that I get to tell how I slept on a cot in a huge room with absolutely no privacy and a bunch of people cramped together for oh about three months? 

Starting Monday(maybe earlier) Pine 5, Spruce 1, Pine 2, Hickory 1, and Hickory 2 will be heading out into the field and getting our boots on the ground! We are all wicked excited and antsy to get started, which may sound crazy, but this is what every single person signed up for... To make a difference in people's lives, in our country, and in the government. Okay so the Government one is a bit of stretch BUT, it's something that the year ahead of us had done! Thanks to the first FEMA Corps DSA(DisasterSurvivorAssistant) was born! This is a program which enables workers to go directly to the survivor and explain to them what is happening during the process of getting assistance. We are called the "eyes, ears, and heart of FEMA" which makes me proud to tell you the truth. This uniform is becoming a part of me the "A" is something that I wear with pride and share the story with pride. To give myself for service is the best decision I have ever made, my team has become my family and I have become their little sister, I guess I can't get away from big brothers! Haha. I have feeling that I'm stuck with them all now and they are stuck with me! 

The road that we have is going to be a bit broken, that's a grantee, but we will hold each other up and call out each other when it needs to be done. We will make fun of each other when we need to

Smile, we will simply be together. This will be an experience that will change my life forever. " In The End, The Journey Brought Joys That Outweigh The Pain" this lyric basically sums up life in my perspective. 

Thank you guys so much for staying with me and being patient for these!! I'm sorry about the bad writing and spelling mistakes, I have to write these on my phone. Once again I hope I here from you and I would LOVE letters from anyone even if I don't know you well or just don't know you! Love you all!! And miss you all!!! 

My bags for the next three months or so 

The most interesting scene of Nebraska 

Colorado! 

I found a river near our hotel! 

Our new home!! 

We're a bit crammed